I never thought the bonding would be so difficult. It is! Last night, I tried to put him to bed - he srceamed blue murder, for about 15 mins. Then Mike came in the room, he stopped and within 10 mins, he was asleep. Then, I cried for 20 mins. I am so, so glad he has bonded with Mike.....
Sorry guys but I am finishing this post started by Marcy as she wrote this huge post on a computer that some visiters let us borrow, and it erased most of what she wrote :(
Marcy is having a very hard time of it as Jaxon seems to have a selective club of people he will let in. For example, the people who have been staying with us had 3 daughters 9 and under. He would only let the oldest girl even touch him. He loved playing with her but if either of the other girls tried to play with him he would have a fit. He seems to be warming up to Marcy with each day, but it is very hard to see her hurt as he has attached to me like she would want him to her. I try to give them more and more time alone together to hopefully form that bond.
I got home at noon and Marcy said that Jaxon said "Mama". :) I pray the walls will come down quickly.
The first night he was great! Went to sleep and slept through the night. The problem was that about 2:30 he started to move, and move and move. Not much sleep happened after that for us.
Pretty tired yesterday. Jaxon had a pretty good day although we have found out the hard way that he doesn't like his diaper changed and he doesn't like baths. Screams blue murder!! And everyone within earshot (especially when we are on the town) yells at us or gives us a naste stare. Rather embarrassing, as it seems our African child is the only one that cries, or so the people seem to imply.
Last night we had a playpen for him to sleep in and so the night was so much better for Marcy and I. He slept through the night and when we woke up at 6:30 Jaxon was standing quietly in the pen just waiting for us :)
I hate to cut this short but I am already very late getting back to Marcy and Jaxon. We may try swimming tomorrow??? Until tomorrow then.
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Hang in there Marcy. Just be yourself and before long Jaxon will be stuck on you. It's not a reflection on you, he just needs time, just be yourself and relax. As for the diaper change, try the standing up method and remember the phrase, whatever works!
ReplyDeleteHave fun swimming!
I know it must be hard for you when Jaxon gives you the look and screams but remember we talked about baby steps. Even though the look is funny try to not laugh it probably makes him madder. On the other side of the coin you will have many,many things to laugh about with him and the things he does. Maybe Mike should sit in your lap so Jaxon sees that it is O.K. HAHAHA! You could also tuck Mike into bed give him a kiss with Jaxon watching you and then tuck try to tuck Jaxon into bed. Mike may have to be the role model and be a little kid for a bit so that Jaxon has something to base his behavior on. I know it sounds funny but it might work. Alot of children do not like their diaper changed who knows why but I know the one child I had did so I gave him a treat to eat when I was changing him we slowly graduated to him holding a toy and now he is fine. Remember that as a small child they do not have control over very many things in their lives. The things that they can control is their voice, screaming, and their body movements. So his being wild at change time is one of few things that he can control. Same goes for his napping. I know it is hard but try to not let it get to you keep talking to him and telling him what you are going to be doing. He sounds like he is very smart and I think you would rather have a spirited child then one that does nothing. Another idea when you wipe his bottom , if you are not doing it already, try using a hot cloth
ReplyDeleteWe really miss you and can not wait till you get home Our hopes and prayers are with you cannot wait for the next up date